Concealed Carry in Space: Should our astronauts be armed?
It’s not a scene out of Moonraker, we promise. The Russian Federal Space Agency apparently has a long tradition of sending their cosmonauts into space with a concealed firearm. While nuclear weapons are generally prohibited in space due to the Limited Test Ban Treaty, that hasn’t stopped the Russians from sending their cosmonauts up with their own TOZ-82. This is a rare 20 gauge shotgun developed specifically for close to medium quarters. A rare triple barrel shotgun, it was mainly marketed as a bear defense gun in the event cosmonauts got stranded in Siberia. The main reason this came to light is because the Russian Federation has plans to upgrade the TOZ-82 to a new variant
It was only recently that Russian cosmonauts stopped carrying the 9x18mm Makarov in their kit. As both NASA and Roscosmos have been working on the International Space Station, this sentiment has brought an understandable amount of hesitation on behalf of both European and American astronauts. However, how effective would a shotgun be in space? Who wants to find out?!
Sending Up Reinforcements…
Thankfully, the guys over at Ammo Man decided to even out the odds. Their warehouse guys devised a way to get a single 9mm parabellum
bullet as far up as a helium balloon could take it. While American astronauts are traditionally not armed, at least this gives them the added advantage if they do happen upon one of those sweet, sweet Makarovs. Wait – a parabellum bullet is 9x19mm. Will it even fit in a Makarov?!
The downside of this experiment? The farther up the balloon goes, the more the gas expands. And by the time the balloon reached 120,000 ft (~22 miles), it burst sending that round plummeting to the surface. The good news is that Ammo Man decided well in advance there’s no point of sending a live round up so they sent an inert one instead. The bad news is that 22 miles in altitude – while impressive – is still about 80 miles short of Low Earth Orbit. The International Space Station cruises at or around 255 miles above the surface of the earth.
Practicalities of Concealed Carry in Space
Really, now that the taboo of carrying firearms in space is out of the way – why not? Bullets would work just fine in space due to the law of conservation of mass. Because each bullet has its own starter fuel for ignition, it would theoretically travel in a mostly straight line for quite some time until the pull of gravity from a larger body shifted it off course. There would be a slight problem with the oxygen rich environment aboard the space craft. And a big lingering question as to if that bullet would perforate the hull which is reputed to be as thin in some places as a single aluminum sheet.
And while we think all astronauts would look just dandy with their own outside the waistband concealed carry holsters, let’s be honest – we’d rather see them develop the next space age technology to apply to future Alien Gear concealed carry holsters. We will also take a lightly used TOZ-82 and a Makarov. You know… For stray Siberian bears.
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James England is a former United States Marine Signals Intelligence Operator and defense contractor with over two tours spread over the Al Anbar province and two more operating across Helmand and Baghdis. He is presently a writer focused on Western foreign policy and maintains an avid interest in firearms. A graduate of the University of North Carolina at Wilmington, he presently resides in New Hampshire – the “Live Free or Die” state. He is finishing up his first novel, “American Hubris”, which is set to hit shelves in Fall of 2015.[/box]
